Author’s note: This satirical column is a follow-up to the Ivana-Donald conversation published last month.
“We must fix our broken immigration system. That means stopping illegal immigration. And it means welcoming properly vetted legal immigrants, regardless of their race or religion. Just like we have for centuries.”- Nikki Haley (our UN Ambassador, whose parents immigrated from India)
Ivanka- Good morning, Rabbi. My Dad’s been at it again.
Rabbi- Good Morning. Yes, I have been following him on social media and TV.
Ivanka- This time, he has decided to call some nations “s***holes”. It is no accident that they are African and non-white countries.
Rabbi- Why do you think he said these things?
Ivanka- I do not like to admit it, but my Dad has always been a racist.
Rabbi- Why do you believe this to be true? Do you have specifics?
Ivanka- Since he has been President, he has done a number of bigoted things. Among them, he has: A) equated the Charlottesville anti-racists with the white supremacists they were protesting against; B) called an Indiana-born judge a “Mexican” who he said could not objectively judge him; and C) called a Senator “Pocahontas.” When he was campaigning, he frequently referred to one black supporter in the crowd as “my African-American.” And, then there was the whole “birther” Kenya thing that he started to discredit Obama.
Rabbi- Is this a recent trend with your father, simply related to political expediency and appealing to the bigotry of the base, or do you believe that he has historically been racist?
Ivanka- As a Jew, it makes me uncomfortable and embarrassed to answer that question. In fact, this entire conversation upsets me.
Rabbi- Would you like to stop?
Ivanka- No, I need to speak with someone. When I talk to my Dad, he just tells me that he is the least racist person in the world. But, he is not based on his history. Back in the 1970s when my Dad headed the “Trump Organization,” it was sued for housing discrimination by NYC. Instead of settling, my Dad hired Roy Cohn (yes, that Roy Cohn, McCarthy’s man) to fight it. He lost the case. He even told the head of his Atlantic City Cosine that “laziness is a trait in blacks.”
Rabbi- I understand, that is quite disturbing. Do you think he can see the light and change?
Ivanka- Honestly, I don’t think so because he believes he has done nothing wrong.